Allow yourself to fail

Failures happen. And they suck. But when they do, allow yourself to fail.

Allow yourself to admit you’ve failed. Whether it was something you did or something someone did behind your back. It happened. It is painful. It’s here.

Allow yourself to be humble and vulnerable through this time. You’re human, you have feelings, so exercise your right to feel. You have a right to feel down and unhappy.

Allow yourself to feel hurt. To cry. To unleash your pain. Somehow, when you cry in pain if you break an arm, everyone is sympathetic, but when you cry when your heart is broken, many shrug their shoulders. “It’s just a heart”. No, it’s not “just a heart”. IT’S A HEART, FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE!!

Allow yourself to be lost. When life hits you, it’s normal to lose a sense of who and where you are. You don’t need to rush to make it out of the woods. Instead, sit down and acknowledge your situation. When you’re ready, stand up and start walking. Tiny steps first, but they will help you find the ground underneath your feet again.

Allow yourself to be afraid. The opposite of fear is courage. Once you recognise your fear, you’ll be ready to find the courage.

Allow yourself to be here, in this moment, but don’t get destructive. Take good care of yourself and forget the others, especially those who put you in this moment. You’ll take your revenge later if you feel like it, but right now, it’s about you. Allow yourself to be selfish right now.

Treat yourself to something nice. You don’t need to break the bank. Just wear your favourite clothes or buy yourself flowers or eat that slice of cheesecake or light that candle or binge-watch Netflix all night long. Failures make you feel unimportant and undeserving – fight that. You are important and you deserve happiness. Whatever it is that may help you remind yourself of that, do it.

Talk about it. Because giving voice to your pain will set it free: every word that leaves your mouth is every bit of pain that leaves your soul. There are people who care, allow them to care for you and listen to you.

Failure is not the end. It is just an episode. And it will pass. Like so many other negative things that passed, this one will too. And deep down you know it.

So allow yourself to move on – one day, someday, when you’re ready. Yes, you will be ready one day. And you’ll be fine.

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